Strictly Humor: Why Do People Keep Trying to Assassinate Caesar?!

Excerpts from a recent gem on McSweeney’s:

I’m confused, maybe someone can help me. This is like the third assassination attempt on Julius Caesar, but things are going great in Rome. The value of silver is strong, the liberti/bad homines immigration is under control, and we’ve bounced back from the bubonic pandemic.

I heard one person say it’s because he’s trying to seize power from the Senate and become an all-powerful dictator, but like, just because he refused to concede power when his term as governor ended and then sent his military across the Rubicon, essentially doing an insurrection on Rome, doesn’t indicate any of that. If that were the case, wouldn’t the Senate say something? Haven’t heard anything from Brutus or Cassius yet, so that’s a non-starter.

Some are also pointing to the preemptive strike on Carthage and how it doesn’t seem to have clearly defined objectives or a coherent exit strategy, and could potentially ignite Punic War III. But taking out an adversary’s enriched trebuchet program and stockpile of intercontinental ballista munitions is imperative to the safety of the entire world, so even though Caesar seems to be making it up as he goes along as an excuse to blow stuff up, we should still just trust our Commander in Chief. He wouldn’t lie to us, even though he constantly lies to us.

Sure, one could also make the economic argument. Inflation is devaluing silver, he’s gutting finance to healers and apothecaries, his corrupt policies only help his aristocrat friends, his tariffs on the Silk Road are backfiring and pushing the expenses down to local agora merchants and traders, and his corruption is creating extreme poverty among the lower and middle castes as well as low global confidence in our Republic, but that’s just how this stuff works. We should trust him on economic issues; he’s a businessman…

Read the rest here…

Disclaimer: 

Hyehudi.org does not condone harm toward any holder of the purple ש”ט. Any tales of violence Roman or Republic serve strictly for illustrative effect.

Stop Using ‘Looters Will Just Take It’ as an Excuse Not To Stockpile Discreetly

Your Supplies Probably Won’t Be Stolen in a Disaster

April 22nd, 2026

When I write about things like storing food or medication in case of disaster, one common response I get is that it doesn’t matter: society will break down, and people who are stronger than you will take your stuff. This seemed plausible at first, but it’s actually way off.

Looking at past disasters, people mostly fall somewhere on a “kind and supportive” to “keep to themselves” spectrum. When there is looting it’s typically directed at stores, not homes, and violence is mostly in the streets. Having supplies at home lets you stay out of the way.

One distinction it’s worth making is between short (hurricane, earthquake) and long (siege, economic collapse, famine) disasters. Having what you need at home is really helpful in both cases, but differently so.

In short disasters (1917 Halifax explosion, London Blitz, 1985 Mexico City earthquake, 2011 Japanese earthquake and tsunami) you typically see sharing and mutual aid. Stored supplies mean you’re not competing for scarce resources, have slack to help others, and make you more comfortable.

Stories of looting in situations like this are often exaggerated or cherry-picked. I had heard post-Katrina New Orleans had a lot of looting, but this was actually rumor. There’s a really good article, “Katrina Takes a Toll on Truth, News Accuracy” on how rumors got reported as fact, and how the truth was nowhere near this bad. But the rumors had real effect at the time, including contributing to  police and vigilante overreaction. Future disasters will also have rumors and reckless people with guns trying to be the ‘good guys’; more reason to stock what you need so you can stay home.

Long disasters are uglier. Here I think having supplies matters even more, but so does caution. The siege of Leningrad is a pretty extreme example, where survival mostly came down to things outside people’s control (ex: ration categories). When people did have stored food, however, it was very helpful as long as they were discreet. As people became increasingly desperate over the prolonged siege-induced starvation there are stories of people cooking at night or eating food raw to avoid alerting their neighbors (and, in the case of raw food, also because of lack of fuel).

Argentina and Venezuela are less extreme examples, but still informative. Because these were not nearly as severe as Leningrad there was much less societal breakdown. When there was violence and theft, it was concentrated around stores and transit; while there were home robberies this was uncommon. People who had more at home needed to shop less, which meant less exposure.

Continue reading here…

From Jeff Kaufman, here.

בד”ץ ביתר עילית – נגד שושי סלפסקי הורסת המשפחות

מחאה ואזהרה חמורה

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על החתום:

הרב דוד צבי אורדנטליך, הרב צבי ברוורמן, הרב שלמה איצקוביץ

הנה צילום מבית דין נוסף (יחד עם קריאה זו) שהבאנו בעבר נגד שושי סלפסקי:

מכתבי הדיינים נגד המרשעת שושי סלפסקי, הסדנא המובילה

בגדי ה’ראשון לציון’: מי כאן הנוכל האמתי

הנה מכתב איומים (תפלים כנראה) שהתפרסם לאחרונה, נשלח לאייל ציונוב:

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הלא אדרבא, כל אחד שלובש את מרדעת הזהב הוא מתחזה ונוכל!

הרי הלבוש המלכותי מגיע מהמושל העותמני שכבר אינו קיים. של מי הוא שגריר?!

זה כמו דרכון של הסובייטים בזה”ז. אין שליח לאחר מיתה.

בר מן דין ובר מן דין, ז”ל ירושלמי סנהדרין:
ר’ מנא מיקל לאילין דמתמניי בכסף. רבי אימי קרא עליהון אלהי כסף ואלהי זהב לא תעשו לכם. א”ר יאשיה וטלית שעליו כמרדעת של חמור. א”ר שיין זה שהוא מתמני בכסף אין עומדין מפניו ואין קורין אותו רבי והטלית שעליו כמרדעת של חמור. רבי זעירא וחד מן רבנן הוון יתיבין עבר חד מן אילין דמיתמני בכסף. אמר יתיה דמן רבנין לרבי זעירא נעביד נפשין תניי ולא ניקום לון מן קמוי. תירגם יעקב איש כפר גבורייא הוי אומר לעץ הקיצה עורי לאבן דומם הוא יורה יודע הוא יורה הנה הוא תפוס זהב וכסף לא בכספייא איתמני וכל רוח אין בקרבו לא חכים כלום הוי אומרי’ בעיתון ממנייה.