Thought-Provoking Humor on King Nebuchadnezzar

Thought he would live forever

But he didn’t.

On Tuesday, January 20, 2022, I asked the Polish uber driver, who drove me and my son home from school, if he had ever heard of King Nebuchadnezzar.

He frowned and said, “Excuse me?” I repeated, “Have you ever heard of Nebuchadnezzar?” He shook his head no.

On Thursday, January 22, 2022, I again asked an uber driver, from Moldova this time, if he knows who the great Nebuchadnezzar is. He said that he is sorry. He does not know him. This was actually very okay with me. It would be more worrisome if he said that he did know him.

My son asked me why I always ask people about Nebuchadnezzar. I explained to him that it is for research purposes, and he accepted this matter of factly, without argument. It’s a good thing he’s not a teenager yet.

That day, I also asked the uber driver driving me to the dentist, who said he was from China, after ascertaining that he spoke enough English to grasp the question at hand. “Have you ever heard of Nebuchadnezzar?” “No, I’m sorry.” I thought some context might help him. “You know, king of Babylon? Long time ago?” “No, sorry. I don’t know about it.”

Upon exiting the Uber, I accosted the next person I saw on the street, an old Jewish lady from Pennsylvania, and asked her if she is familiar with Nebuchadnezzar. She said, “No, I’m sorry”, and took the stairs instead of the elevator I was waiting for. Probably likes exercise.

I also asked a FedEx guy from Liberty, who was stuck in the elevator with me while it was going up to the dentists office, if he knows who Nebuchadnezzar is. He also didn’t know, and took to staring at his package.

I even asked the receptionist at my dentist about Nebuchadnezzar. She said, “No. Am I supposed to?” I said no, that’s fine. Turned out the lady from Pennsylvania was going to the same dentist, and when she came in, I thanked her for helping me with my research, and rewarded her and the receptionist with portions of the story. I kept on offering to stop, but they wanted me to keep on talking, so it must be interesting enough.

Just to be safe, I decided to ask the other lady in the waiting room, who looked very young and very friendly. She was from Cape Verde, an island off the coast of Africa. She also didn’t know. Finally, I asked my Uber driver on the way home. He was from Haiti, his name was Love, and he had a voodoo priest father and churchgoing mother. He also didn’t know. But he did give me permission to include his real name and fascinating personal information.

This research may have cost me some interpersonal respect along the way, but it was thoroughly done. No matter what the country, age, nationality, religion, or language of the people I asked, they had no idea who Nebuchadnezzar was. Some even thought it sounded like an odd name.

I should note that on January 26, an Armenian uber driver, who turned out to be a history buff, did know who he was. I explained about this research, and asked if there is any chance that we have to worry that Nebuchadnezzar might still be the king of the world. He said not to worry, Nebuchadnezzar is not king of the world, in fact he is long dead and gone, and I trust him, because no one else even knew who he was.

On the basis of this research, it is safe to conclude that Nebuchadnezzar is no longer powerful, and certainly not the king of the world, and has failed to achieve his goal of reigning forever.

From Isha Yiras Hashem, here.