True story:
Reuven and Shimon were somewhat close friends. Reuven desperately needed help, so Shimon granted it. Shimon thought nothing of this. But Reuven, ashamed of his benefactor, now avoids Shimon entirely. Shimon did chessed, and lost a friend for it.
Shimon was again approached for help by Levi, another friend. Recalling his negative experience, he hesitates.
Who is to blame? Reuven.